Most anything has some distortion. Living today is a little like standing in front of a funhouse mirror that stretches the legs to the size of sticks and puts knees where ankles should be. What is real? Even nature affords illusion. Arid deserts have mirages of water; it looks real, but approach it and it disappears. We must be aware of illusion – of distortion, because some businesses and people practice it. When our own eyes squint against truth we are creating distortion. If we can’t trust ourselves to recognize the truth, who can we trust?
What we do is largely decided by the thought we give it in the beginning.
Should I spend my time complaining? Should I take my attitude out on others? Should I whine about how little I have and how badly I feel? Or should I be grateful that I have another opportunity today to do something?
The day is in your hands. You will reap what you sow. If you want to be loved, then love; if you want peace, then be peaceful; if you want to be free, then give others their freedom. We must learn to forgive others without reservation in order to truly be forgiven and live the life we are meant to live. But most importantly, we must learn to live our lives without the projection of illusion.
Normally, I am where good tags go to die a slow and painful death but I was tagged by the beautiful and vivacious Devyl Gyrl over at www.devylgyrl.com and really, who could resist her?
Here are the rules:
Go to your picture files
Go to your 6th folder.
Go to your 6th picture.
Tell us about it.
Tag 6 friends to do the same.
Without further ado I give you…(drumroll please)
About 2 weeks ago, the sky looked like it was on fire – it was absolutely amazing. I grabbed my camera and walked down to the end of the street to the Boys and Girls Club Parking lot (aptly named “Positive Place”) and started shooting. This is one in a series of approximately 15 taken at different angles and from different locations on the block. By far, this was one of my favorite shots in the series because of the inclusion of the street sign.
Will spare you all the agony of being tagged but would challenge you all to do the same and post a link to your blog here. I’d love to see your photos.
There been times that I thought I couldn’t last for long But now I think I’m able to carry on It’s been a long, a long time coming But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will ~Sam Cooke
Did you know that if your life was not changing, you would not exist?
Our Universe and everything in it is continually changing, because our Universe is made of energy. Energy can only exist if it is in motion and changing. If energy stopped being in motion, our entire Universe and all Life would vanish. Our lives are also energy, and therefore they too must always be in motion and continue to change. You cannot stop the motion and change in your life, and nor would you want to. The changing nature of energy gives us Life. It causes Life to grow and causes us to grow.
And yet when there is a big change of energy which affects our lives, we often label it as bad, and cause ourselves sorrow, pain, and suffering by resisting the change. But you always have a choice. In the Universe there is never just one way. You are never trapped with no way out, no matter what has occurred. There are two paths available to you in every circumstance and moment in your life. The two paths are the positive and the negative, and YOU are the one who chooses which path you will take.
You have the power to transform negative change into positive, but you cannot do it by resisting the change. Resisting the change is focusing on the negative and it is choosing the negative path, which brings with it even more negativity, more pain, and misery.
To transform the negative into positive, you must choose the positive path and command that this changing energy transforms into millions of blessings that pour down on you and everyone involved. Command the changing energy to bring unlimited good and positivity. Know and believe in your heart that as you command it, it must be done.
And then the day will come in the not too distant future, when you will look back and see all the blessings that you brought into this world through you and change.
There are two words that, when spoken, have the most unfathomable power to completely change your life. Two words which, when they pass your lips, will be the cause of bringing absolute joy and happiness to you. Two words that will create miracles in your life. Two words that will wipe out negativity. Two words that will bring you abundance in all things. Two words which, when uttered and sincerely felt, will summon all the forces and vibrations in the Universe to move all things for you.
The only thing standing between you, happiness, and the life of your dreams, are two words…
THANK YOU
Gratitude is one of the easiest and most powerful ways to transform your life. If you become truly grateful, you will magnetize absolute joy to you everywhere you go, and in everything you do. In fact, without gratitude, nothing can ever change. Your life will change to the degree that you use gratitude and begin to feel grateful. If you are just a little bit grateful, your life will change a little bit. If you are very grateful, your whole life will change. If you live gratitude every single day, you will become one of the greatest human beings on the planet, and the light of your life will uplift our world.
The greatest human beings who have ever lived showed us the way with gratitude, and by their example became shining lights in our history. Einstein said “thank you” hundreds of times every single day! Ancient wisdom dating back thousands of years gave us the truth about gratitude. Every single religion speaks of giving thanks. All the sages and saviors of the world demonstrated the use of gratitude in all their teachings.
It is impossible to be negative when you are giving thanks. It is impossible to criticize or blame when you are feeling grateful. It is impossible to feel sad when you are in gratitude. Most people are sporadically grateful, however, to change your life with gratitude, a new way of learning how to be truly grateful is what will bring unlimited happiness into your life.
So how do you live in gratitude? Begin your day by feeling grateful. Be grateful for the bed you just slept in, the roof over your head, the carpet or floor under your feet, the running water, the soap, your shower, your toothbrush, your clothes, your shoes, the car that you drive, your job, your friends, your refrigerator that keeps your food cold. Be grateful for the weather, the sun, the sky, the birds, the trees, the grass, the rain, and the flowers. Be grateful for the stores that make it so easy to buy the things you need, the restaurants, the utilities and services and electrical appliances that make your life effortless. Be grateful for magazines and the books that you read. Be grateful for the chair that you sit on, and the pavement that you walk on. Be grateful for your favorite music that sweeps you away, and for movies that make you feel good. Be grateful for your phone that connects you with people, for your computer, for the electricity that lights up your life. Be grateful for air travel that flies you everywhere. Be grateful for the roads and traffic lights that keep the traffic in order. Be grateful to those who built our bridges. Be grateful for your pet, for your child, for your loved ones, for your eyes that enable you to read this. Be grateful for your imagination. Be grateful that you can think! Be grateful that you can speak. Be grateful that you can laugh and smile. Be grateful that you can breathe! Be grateful that you are alive! Be grateful that you are You! Be grateful that there are two words that can change your life!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
The more that you practice gratitude the more deeply you will feel it in your heart, and the depth of the feeling is the key. The more deeply and sincerely you feel it, the more you will bring absolute bliss and happiness on every single subject. Watch what happens in your life when you practice gratitude every single day and in every single moment and in every opportunity that you can. Remember, if you are criticizing, you are not being grateful. If you are blaming, you are not being grateful. If you are complaining, you are not being grateful. If you are feeling tension, you are not being grateful. If you are rushing, you are not being grateful. If you are in a bad mood, you are not being grateful.
To understand the power and the magic of gratitude, you have to experience it for yourself. So why not begin by deciding to find 100 things a day to be grateful for? As you practice gratitude every day, it won’t take long before gratitude is your natural state of being, and when it happens you will have unlocked one of the greatest Secrets to Life.
There is just one other thing that I want you to know about Gratitude…..
When you are giving thanks, you FEEL GOOD!
The above excerpt was taken from an e-mail I received from The Secret Scrolls
I am thankful for each and everyone of my friends. I hope that all of you find the happiness you are looking for and remember how much you truly have to be thankful for.
Thank you for always being there for me, for listening when I can’t hear myself and for being YOU.
In the past year I have seen families destroyed, people torn down for their beliefs and lifestyle choices, people degraded, mistreated and outcast for nothing other than being true to themselves. I have seen people band together to lift each other up in times of need. I have seen outpourings of love, support and unconditional acceptance of others. I have seen friendships forged, love found, lives lost and lives welcomed into the world. I have seen bodies ravaged by drug abuse, I have seen children succeed, businesses fail, and the first african american elected to office.
During my travels today, the hope of the new year was buzzing around me like angry bees. Everyone I came across was resolving to do something BETTER in 2009. It dawned on me that MAYBE they don’t get it…maybe they don’t realize that they don’t get to wipe their slate clean when the clock tolls midnight on December 31st; there are no “do overs”. You can’t take back those angry words, you can’t undo hurt or pain you may have inflicted on others. No resolution or “changing of the guard” will magically make it go away. How you choose to live and behave today has a DIRECT effect on how you are perceived tomorrow.
How are you living your life? Are you grateful for the people around you that lift you up and support you no matter what? Do you always treat others the way that you want to be treated? Are you using patience? Are you tolerant? When you look in the mirror, take a long hard look and inventory. Are you the type of friend that you would want to have? If the answer is yes, then I applaud you; but, if not, make the changes necessary to be that person. This life is too short to walk around angry, entitled, etc. Brush the dirt of your shoulder, make your amends and strive to live your life the way you would want to be remembered.
I want to take this time to thank you, my friends, for being part of my life, lifting me up and always giving me a reason to strive to be a better person tomorrow than I am today. Without each and every one of you, I may not have come out the otherside of 2008 unscathed. I appreciate you for who you are, who you are to become and who you are to me. I cherish you and am so thankful that you are in my life. The journey wouldn’t be the same without you.
This one is simple… the items in BOLD I have accomplished; the items in italics are still on the list. The ones that I’ve crossed out…well, that ain’t happening in THIS or any other lifetime
1. Started your own blog 2. Slept under the stars 3. Played in a band 4. Visited Hawaii 5. Watched a meteor shower 6. Given more than you can afford to charity 7. Been to Disneyland 8. Climbed a mountain 9. Held a praying mantis 10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee Jumped 12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea 14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child 16. Had food poisoning 17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables 19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France 20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight 22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort 25. Held a lamb 26. Gone skinny dipping 27. Run a Marathon (okay I didn’t ACTUALLY run..but I have done Bay to Breakers twice) 28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice (does the Venitian in Vegas count? LOL) 29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset 31. Hit a home run 32. Been on a cruise (a bay cruise on a dinner yacht and a San Diego Bay cruise on the USS Ronald Reagan) 33. Seen Niagara Falls in person 34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community 36. Taught yourself a new language 37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied 38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person 39. Gone rock climbing 40. Seen Michelangelo’s David 41. Sung karaoke 42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt 43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant 44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance 47. Had your portrait painted 48. Gone deep sea fishing 49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person 50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris (does the Eiffel in Vegas count?) 51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie 56. Visited the Great Wall of China 57. Started a business 58. Taken a martial arts class 59. Visited Russia 60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason 64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma 65. Gone sky diving 66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check 68. Flown in a helicopter 69. Saved a favorite childhood toy 70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial 71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt 73. Stood in Times Square 74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job 76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone 78. Been on a speeding motorcycle 79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book 81. Visited the Vatican 82. Bought a brand new car 83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible 86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit (I’m not named, personally, but I’m involved)
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day
4.If you could go out and buy one thing today, price is no matter, what would it be?
5.What is your favorite color, and why?
6.If you could be written into the history books, who would you be, what would you have done, and what period of history would you have lived in?
Pandora, cause I want to know what’s in the box
7.If someone named a cocktail after you, what would it be called and what would it taste like?
JENILICIOUS and it would sweet & sassy with a vicious bite that’ll knock you on your ass
8. What song do you think describes YOU?
9. If I came to your town to visit, where would you take me and what
would we do?
We would go to SanFrancisco and I would show you all the wonderful sights, coit tower, broadway, Chinatown, japan town, the height, Pier 39, Ghiradelli Square, Baker Beach, the Presidio, Golden Gate Bridge, Golden Gate Park…
RULES:
1. Put Your iTunes, Windows Media Player, ETC on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
5.Put this on your blog/journal.
1.If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say?
Teach you a Lesson – Robin Thicke
2.How would you describe yourself?
Hero (Mariah Carey)
3.What do you like in a guy?
The Truth (Pharoahe Monche)
4.How do you feel today?
In my mind (Heather Headley)
5.What is your life’s purpose?
Is it Possible (Raheem Devaughn)
6.What is your motto?
What it’s like (Everlast)
7.What do your friends think of you?
Superstar (Usher)
8.What do you think of your parents?
I Will Always Love you (Whitney Houston)
9.What do you think about very often?
Flashing Lights (Kanye West)
10.What is 2 + 2?
The Last Time (Rhianna)
11.What do you think of your best friend?
Let’s Get Blown (Raheem Devaughn)
12.What do you think of the person you like? I Want You (Common)
13.What is your life story? Fighter (Christina Aguilera)
14.What do you want to be when you grow up?
For the Nasty (Tribe Called Quest)
15.What do you think of when you see the person you like? Nice and Slow (Usher)
16.What will you dance to at your wedding?
More and More (Brian McKnight)
17.What will they play at your funeral? Let it Go (Keyshia Cole)
18.What is your hobby/interest?
Uhh Ahhh Uhhh (Boys II Men)
19.What is your biggest fear?
In Too Deep (Phil Collins)
20.What is your biggest secret?
Right Here (Staind)
21.What do you think of your friends? Diary (Alicia Keys)
Deeper and deeper into the abyss I sink
Knowing every breathe I take may be my last
I search in the darkness
Reaching out
And realize
Once again
I am alone
The crows are singing
Their song of night
And I know
That it won’t be long
Before the last spark of light
Has been extinguished
And the darkness
Is allowed to take me
Somewhere in the midst of all the chaos that has surrounded my life these past few months I have found my center AND my forgiveness. Love and forgiveness start from within. Release the past, release the pain and tell yourself that it IS okay to feel hurt AND forgive. It is in that release and acceptance that you will find your wings…
I have
Please take the time to read the lyrics and listen to the entire song – it is absolutely amazing!
WINGS OF FORGIVNESS
~INDIA.ARIE~
I just want you to know
After everything that we’ve been through
I just want you to know
That I still love you
That I still love you
Had to go
Across the water
Just to find
What was here in my heart all along
Spent so much time
Trying to be right
That I was dead wrong
If Nelson Mandela can forgive his oppressors
Surely I can forgive you for your passion
You’re only human
Let’s shake free this gravity of resentment
And fly high, and fly high
You’re only human
Let’s shake free this gravity of judgment
And fly high on the wings of forgiveness
Had to run
To the arms of curiosity
Just to find
What was here in my life all along
I have found that the art of simplicity
Simply means making peace with your complexity
If Gandhi can forgive persecution
Surely you can forgive me for being so petty
I’m only human
Let’s shake free this gravity of resentment
And fly high, and fly high
You’re only human
Let’s shake free this gravity of judgment
And fly high on the wings of forgiveness
I’ve searched for romance
Flowers and affection
What I found is a lesson
Of what love really is
Found the game of love is
Not about how much you can take
In fact authentic love is about
How much you can give
After everything that we’ve been through
I just want you to know
That I still love you
I want you to know
That I forgive you
(thank you for teaching how to give)
And I wanna let you know how much you changed my life
I wanna let you know you taught me how to fly
And I wrote this song to tell you this
I’m better cuz you taught me how to give
I took a swim
In the sea of guilt and misery
To find myself on an island
In the middle of nowhere
In my solitude
I asked to know the highest truth
And what I was told
Is to thy own self be true
If Jesus can forgive crucifixion
Surely we can survive and find resolution
Let’s keep it moving
Let’s shake free this gravity of resentment
And fly high, and fly high
You’re only human
Let’s shake free this gravity of judgment
And fly high, and fly high
Let’s keep it moving
Let’s shake free this gravity of commitment
And fly high on the wings of forgiveness
After everything that we’ve been through
I just want you to know
That I still love you
I want you to know
That I still love you
And I wanna let you know how much you changed my life
I wanna let you know you taught me how to fly
And I wrote this song to tell you this
I’m better cuz you taught me how to give
I still love you
I want you to know
I still love you
Want you to know
I still love you
(And I always will love you)…
you wrap your lies in pretty boxes
you tie them with a bow Disguising yourself from yourself
but the truth is in the know You hide behind the smoke and mirrors
wave the magic wand A magician you are not
you’re time will soon be gone
Enough rope to hang yourself
A fool who’s unaware Your demise is close at hand
a fate you’ll have to bear Logic and reason have left your side
Chances are all used up
I’ve tried and tried to open your eyes but
you choose to keep them shut I can no longer stand idly by
and watch this world unfold Goodbye can be the hardest word
something’s are better left untold
The lines of time stare back at her like a road map to her soul
Her image a ghost of things remembered A past not long forgotten
A glimmer just behind the darkness
In the distance the voices call We are here We are here
Arms reach out voices assuage
If only she would recognize that “she” is waiting with those that love them both
********************************************************** I wrote this for a VERY dear frien who was going through a hard time. I want to let her know how absolutely loved and adored she is by all that know her. Having her in my life has made me a better person. Sharing experiences with her has enriched my life. (Baby girl, you are NOT alone – the help is there – WE are here if only you ask. I will do everything within my power – move heaven and earth to ensure that both you and those beautiful babies are safe. Remember…have shovel -WILL travel. I LOVE YOU)
On a side note….(Yes, I know it’s Wordless Wednesday but THIS IS IMPORTANT)
Today is the last day for entries into the fabulous holiday contest my friends are putting on. A few moments of your time, a few comments and you could be one of the 2 lucky winners. If nothing else, check them out – their blogs are almost as fantastic as they are…
Okay, I admit it…I stole this from a friend (or two)…but how better to spend a Monday morning of unemployment then reveal a few things you may (or may not) have known about ME
TEN things you wish you could say to TEN different people right now:
1. SERIOUSLY?
2. Um…fuck off. kthnxbai
3. Stupid is as stupid does and you’ve taken stupid to a whole new level.
4. Get over it (and yourself)!
5. Jesus loves you…wait, no he doesn’t. He thinks you’re an asshole just like everyone else.
6. Medication. You need it.
7. You’re fucking kidding me, right?
8. Is it REALLY necessary to be playing Christmas music in November?
9. Take this job and shove it!
10. I miss you.
Nine things about yourself:
1. My wrists are double jointed and yet I still have carpal tunnel. umm…
2. I love candles
3. I may come across as a bitch sometimes but deep down inside I’m just a big teddy bear.
4. I am fiercely protective and loyal to my friends. FIERCELY.
5. I hurt deeply but am quick to forgive. Life is too short to walk around angry and upset.
6. I have compromised my true self in order to keep a roof over my head. That stops NOW
7. I haven’t had sex in over a year (YIKES). But don’t require sex unless I am in a truly committed relationship.
8. I’ve hung out with, dated, etc. a few famous people – and I still have some on speed dial. In the end, they are just – PEOPLE. They have the same issues, same wants, needs, desires, etc. the only difference is their entire lives are thrown out for the world to see and critique. I haven’t been star struck since I was 16 because of it.
9. I want to be a psychologist or in a field where I am actually doing good for others and not just pushing pencils and keys.
Eight Ways to win your heart:
1. Remember me. A 5 second phone call or text message just to say you were thinking of me goes a LONG way.
2. Make me smile.
3. Hold my hand. Just because.
4. Hold an intelligent conversation.
5. Share your world.
6. Make me think.
7. DON’T try to impress me with money. It won’t work
8. Walk with me
Seven things that cross your mind a lot:
1. WTF?
2. Is there any end to this madness?
3. Mmmm…. Taco Bell Must stay on the diet.
4. Don’t make me slap the taste out yo mouf!
5. MOTHERFUCKER!
6. I could have gone without seeing THAT
7. Aum
Six things you do before you fall asleep:
1. Meditate
2. Moisturize.
3. Brush my teeth
4. Blow out the candles
5. Hug my son
6. Lock the door
Five people you couldn’t live without:
1. My son
2. My mom
3. Antoine
4. Aaron
5. My friends
Four things you’re wearing right now:
1. Sweats
2. tank top
3. pony tail
4. A smile
Three songs that fit your life perfectly:
1. Stronger – Kanye West
2. Bitch – Meredith Brooks
3. Video – India Arie
Two things you want to do before you die:
1. Machu Pichu
2. Cape Town
One confession:
I’m afraid of failing…
And if you haven’t check it out yet, my fabulous friends are doing a holiday contest. 2 lucky people will be selected to help take the edge off their holiday. Want more info? Go here: spreading-some-holiday-cheer
I just want to take a moment to recognize my fabulous group of friends and bloggers over on plurk.com that have come together to spread some holiday cheer. They have banded together for a contest of sorts that will take a bit of the holiday edge off of 2 lucky winners. Participation is as easy as 1-2-3:
Entry and “Rules”:
The contest runs today through Wednesday.
Comment on each of the bloggers posts listed below each day.
If you blog and would like to post about the contest, you will get 5 extra entries.
There will be two winners.
Each winner will be asked to give a mini bio of their family … ages, genders, wants, needs, likes, etc.
Prizes will be purchased accordingly, wrapped for under the tree, and sent without delay.
Comments and posts from Sunday, November 23 through Wednesday, November 26 will be taken as entries.
The winners will be announced on Black Friday (aka the day after Thanksgiving)
The following FABULOUS bloggers are participating:
(Even if you do not participate in the contest, I encourage you all to take a moment to read this fabulous group of writers. They are genuine, thought provoking and absolutely amazing individuals)
You cut the bitches open, stuff em full of hot peppers, vinegar, sea salt, water (and a few other personal incidentals) and throw ‘em in the freezer!
What a week, what a couple of months. Just as things finally started to come together I was blindsided at work with the reintroduction of “the Heroin Whore.”
The Heroin Whore is not your ordinary, every day type of whore – I mean, this bitch is the nastiest skankiest whore to ever slither out from the primordial ooze. She had cheated, lied to and stolen from my employers; endangered countless ex-employees lives, been convicted of Felony Welfare Fraud and is currently undergoing a multi-part felony trial which includes such gem charges as coercion, receipt of stolen goods, aiding and abetting, possession of narcotics, conspiracy to commit robbery, armed robbery, strong-armed robbery, resisting arrest, assault and battery and (my favorite) assault and battery of a police officer (I hear she’s single..er… her husband has 3 strikes with no hopes of getting out – EVER – any takers?) And yet, here I sit, perplexed and utterly confused as to WHY, in the name of all things unholy, I find myself in the position I am in.
Today, in an effort to clear the air, I made the mistake of approaching the owner (here in to be referred to as PIG VOMIT) in an effort to curtail the continued harassment and hostility that I have experienced by the hands of the Heroin Whore. As an employer, Pig Vomit has a LEGAL duty to ensure the safety and non-harassment of his employs and deal with any allegations of same immediately. He did. By telling ME to take a few days off and going on a tirade about what a piece of shit I am (um…apparently the 5 (yes 5) harassment suits that have been filed AND WON against him over the last 5-7 years have yet to teach him anything.) Oh, and he sided with the Heroin Whore and said that what she, and PIG VOMIT JR., had been doing was completely acceptable in his eyes. (Oh, did I fail to mention that during the course of her previous employment that she broke into the offices twice, ripped off all the computer equipment, rent monies and checks and broke into the restaurant next door stealing food and about $3,500 in cash that was in their safe?) So this leads me to believe that whatever she has on them it must be really good for PIG VOMIT to risk an iron clad lawsuit for harassment; i mean he DID just post an $8,500 bond to bail her whorish ass out of jail two days ago. (The rumors around town (yes my city IS THAT small) are that she is/was sleeping with one or both of them or her 4 month old baby is PIG VOMIT JR.’s – perhaps both *shudder*)
As much as I realize that this is TRULY a blessing in disguise and the powers that be are looking out for me I have to ask WHAT THE FUCK?! I’m trying to maintain a level head but every fiber of my being is screaming at me to take them down. From a spiritual standpoint I am trying to keep from “slipping into the darkside”; the Incredible Hulk put it best when he said “You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.” From an emotional standpoint I just want to cry, not because I am sad, but out of sheer frustration and anger. From a professional standpoint I have called in the troops, am canvassing the internet and am throwing my resume out to anyone that will take a look; times are hard and I have a child to take care of so I can’t sit around and let my anger get the best of me. The rest of me wants to go voodoo on their asses (is there a CajunVegan/Psycho Hose Beast in the hose?) I guess we’ll see which side(s) win in the coming weeks…
It’s been a tough few weeks. Life has a way of testing us the hardest when we feel we cannot take anymore.
I have come out the other side of what will be referred to as “hell weeks”, mostly unscathed. I am a little worn, a few new bumps and bruises, with some minor bleeding, but overall, I am “Just” me. Being able to maintain a level head, disconnecting myself from the emotions of the situations and just tackling things with an objective eye, made all the difference.
This weekend, I spent a lazy Sunday morning watching horror movies, drinking green tea and just enjoying the nothingness of it all. I took a leisurely walk along the marina, found a bench in a quiet rarely traveled area and reconvened with nature and myself. I released all my stress from the past weeks, all my worries, all my what ifs, all the shoulda, coulda, wouldas and reset to 0.
I realized that even though things aren’t exactly how I would like them to be, things are exactly how they are supposed to be. I am where I am needed for the moment. Accepting that and relinquishing control of the uncontrollable is refreshing. I can choose a good attitude, I can choose to accept or I can choose to get irritated and angry; the only thing that will change in the situation is my outlook regardless of which I choose.
I have passed my test.
How has your attitude effected the outcome of your situations? Have you passed or failed your tests?
Yesterday was a beautiful day in Martinez, CA. After spending the good portion of my morning harvesting and crushing grapes for this year’s harvest, running the usual errands and tending to some household chores, I grabbed my camera and headed to the Martinez Marina and Shoreline Park. It’s amazing the beauty you can find in your every day surroundings if you just open your eyes.
The following are a few of the photographs taken during my walk.
Rainbow Trout, Alhambra Creek
Breaking Through
Palms and Dates
Foaming the Fountain
Water Works
Birds on a Wooden Wire
Vista
Egret Reflections
Sway
Sustenance
Where do you find beauty in your every day life? What brings you joy?
I received this in an e-mail today…I know several people (yes, myself included) that are at a crossroads in their lives or are going through major life transitions.
There been times that I thought I couldn’t last for long But now I think I’m able to carry on It’s been a long, a long time coming But I know a change gonna come, oh yes it will ~Sam Cooke
Did you know that if your life was not changing, you would not exist?
Our Universe and everything in it is continually changing, because our Universe is made of energy. Energy can only exist if it is in motion and changing. If energy stopped being in motion, our entire Universe and all Life would vanish. Our lives are also energy, and therefore they too must always be in motion and continue to change. You cannot stop the motion and change in your life, and nor would you want to. The changing nature of energy gives us Life. It causes Life to grow and causes us to grow.
And yet when there is a big change of energy which affects our lives, we often label it as bad, and cause ourselves sorrow, pain, and suffering by resisting the change. But you always have a choice. In the Universe there is never just one way. You are never trapped with no way out, no matter what has occurred. There are two paths available to you in every circumstance and moment in your life. The two paths are the positive and the negative, and YOU are the one who chooses which path you will take.
You have the power to transform negative change into positive, but you cannot do it by resisting the change. Resisting the change is focusing on the negative and it is choosing the negative path, which brings with it even more negativity, more pain, and misery.
To transform the negative into positive, you must choose the positive path and command that this changing energy transforms into millions of blessings that pour down on you and everyone involved. Command the changing energy to bring unlimited good and positivity. Know and believe in your heart that as you command it, it must be done.
And then the day will come in the not too distant future, when you will look back and see all the blessings that you brought into this world through you and change.
I came across the following passages in my email and found them worthy of sharing. Enjoy.
We can change things around us in a number of ways, but it is change in ourselves that makes the biggest difference. To control the door to our minds and decide clearly and precisely what we let in and what can be put out is the beginning. When we are tired of the same dumb mistakes, the same worn ideas, the need for change but nothing is done to start it, then the time has come to see if we really have a goal at all. The biggest obstacle is thinking we have gone too far to change. Clearly it is an idea that should be put outside the mind and the door firmly closed.
It is said that pearls worn by a happy person have a warm and more lustrous glow.
Pearls are like the gentle moments strung together for the happy person – they cannot help but glow.
Gentle moments, like pearls, seem to be so few. Yet, how rich and warm and beautiful they make our lives.
It takes only a few moments to enjoy a talk with someone about good things instead of the bad; it takes only a few moments to drop a line to a shut-in when attention means so much. It takes only a few moments to see a sunset, or read a Scripture, or listen to a child talk.
It takes only a few moments to open the door to happiness. And if happiness seems only a few moments long, so will trouble if we open the door and let it out instead of harboring it.
Life is made up of a few moments all strung together like pearls. Each moment is a pearl, and it is up to us to pick the ones with the highest luster. If we do not have time to do great things, take a few gentle moments and do small things in a great way.
